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In this post you will find 10 easy ways to create a positive place on Facebook.
It is no secret that Facebook can suck out the positive energy faster than dropping a hot potato. Studies prove that it can make you depressed.Additionally, Facebook has admitted social media harms mental health due to rising social alienation. More terrifying is that social media is more “addictive than cigarettes” according to Anxiety.org. Further, people are profiting off our emotions when it comes to Facebook.
Um, ok, I think I’ll have to stop there because I’m beginning to get anxious. And, yeah, I don’t do anxiety if I can help it, which leads me to…
It took me a while to really define my personal boundaries. These were things I really couldn’t stand to see. In fact, it was almost painful. How do you know your personal boundaries?
The easiest way is to find out what makes your blood pressure rise, what kind of posts you hide, and what makes you roll your eyes.
My personal boundaries are politics, and any form of abuse. It’s not necessarily a “trigger” for me, but it’s something I don’t want to see. Another thing is constant vulgar language.
Your items might be very different, because we all have different gauges.
I unfollowed all the news organizations because I got tired of them talking about politics. Sure, I get it, they need to tell us what happens in Washington, but they were getting to be alarmists.
Seriously, everyday they come up with a way how we are all going to die… and um, it hasn’t happened yet.
It also made it kind of harder for me to make the mistake of reading the Facebook comments, where most of the vitrol was spewed.
This is for those who push your boundaries outside of the realm of reason. You personally cannot control anyone else’s actions, but you can control yours. If someone constantly posts something that you don’t like, or makes you feel uncomfortable, unfriend them.
You have set your boundaries of things you don’t want to see, and they have as much right to post what they want, on their personal Facebook page as you do on your personal page.
For me, every time I found a post that was really political (and it didn’t matter what side of the aisle that person was on), I unfriended them.
Now, don’t message them and tell them, “I’m unfriending you because x, y and z.”
I’ll tell you a secret that makes you look desperate and kind of creepy. Just do it quietly, and don’t say a thing about it. If they really want to stay your friend, they will come to you and ask what’s up.
Related: 7 Essential Oils To Make You Happy
This is something that I’m treading carefully on. It is one thing to feel passionate about politics, or about a certain movement. I actually encourage it.
However, it’s a totally different ballgame when the political views become extreme and you’re no longer having a discussion, but are getting attacked.
Again, this is where your own boundaries must come in. However, I am a person of reason and logic. I love to discuss and exchange ideas. But, sometimes, I think people get irrational political views and I start to wonder if they are in a freaking cult.
These are the people who wake up everyday with the only agenda to hate whatever person in any political office is doing. Then, if for whatever reason, you dare to question that reasoning, you’re automatically against their beliefs and therefore should be ostracized.
Yeah. I’m talking about those people.
Or, the people who call you every name in the book because you happen to disagree with them, they also got blocked.
If a person could not carry on a reasonable discussion with me by giving me facts (that were not news reports – which are hearsay – but actual documentation) or were blatantly irrational, they got blocked.
Again, I did this very quietly.
The reason for this is because their negative energy was turning me into an anxious wreck.
A 2007 Study Released by the University of Chicago Press found that Negativity is incredibly contagious, and I was getting tired of their negative energy.
Further, if the truth is told, I don’t give a darn what your political views are. The moment someone starts talking about it, I usually tune it out.
Once we got rid of most of the negative people, by either unfriending or blocking, started posting questions.
The reason isn’t to pry, but to make it fun again. Get to know your friends, and understand what their thoughts are.
The only trick is to put up your guidelines in the post, so that those who respect you will keep within the guidelines.
On all of my questions I put “no politics, sales or self-promotion.” Yes, I even do it when I’m asking a nonsense question. The reason is to let everyone know, coming out the gate, that those things are off limits.
Make sure you respond to everyone who took the time to answer your question. It lets people know that you appreciate them.
It also helps you double check to make sure that people are following your guidelines.
Personally, I get a lot of responses sometimes, and that’s fantastic! I love interacting with my Facebook friends. But, sometimes it’s a lot of responses, so it’s OK to leave a sticker comment or an emoji.
Implement a system that works for you, and make sure that your friends know this system.
It will vary from person to person. My personal system is a three strikes your out policy. I automatically delete any comments on my question that are negative. That’s warning one, warning two is when I personally call out the person and the third they just get unfriended or blocked with no discussion or questions asked.
The reason for this system isn’t to be mean or to be a jerk. It’s mental survival to be honest.
You are taking the time to look on Facebook – why let it stress you out? Consider it keeping the emotional clutter at bay.
This is a huge one where it must be done within reason. If it’s someone that you’re really good friends with in real life, and you recognize they might have put something on your wall by not thinking, just remove the comment and all is well.
However, if it’s someone who doesn’t actively participate on your wall, or rarely comments, just bring the hammer and use it.
Most people – once you start enforcing your “rules” will respect your boundaries. There may be a few smart alecks every now and then, but the more you enforce it, the more they will realize that you mean business.
Remember the days of cat photos and babies? Yeah. Post pictures that people will smile at, post good news stories, post things that give you all the feels.
It may seem sappy at first, but really, you want to feel uplifted, so share all da positive things!
Laughter is the best medicine. Try not to post things that are funny at other people’s expense, but post things that make you laugh.
Don’t worry about offending people, because now a days, heck, a brick offends everybody. Post things that are genuinely funny – but – like the rule above – if it’s political avoid it.
If it’s cute or a funny SNL thing (ok, confession, some of their political things are funny) – you can post it – as long as you make it clear that it’s for humor purposes only.
Creating a positive place on Facebook can be easier than people may think. The hardest thing about it is actually enforcing your “rules.” These are hard, especially if you don’t like conflict, and are afraid of the conflict. The best part about it is that after the first few times, you kinda enjoy getting rid of negative people.
And THAT, my friends, is where we want to be emotionally and mentally. #antinegativity. Amiright?